First Step. Do a Happiness Project

I just finished reading the book The Happiness Project and it recommends making resolutions instead of goals. The difference between a goal and a resolution is that a goal, once you do it its done. But a resolution is something you can stick to for the rest of your life, or for how ever amount of time you'd like.
So this is my first resolution: post on my blog every Tuesday & Thursday, and write every Monday & Wednesday that way I have time to edit.

As part of my new Leaf on this Blog, I want to start it off by doing my own version of the Happiness Project as a means to discover more aspects of myself and to enjoy life more.
I will start planning for it now and start the project in January 1st, 2011 until December 31st, 2011.

What do I want to accomplish with my Happiness project?
I want to be able to not get so upset when a stranger shows no patience toward me, when they are rude and nasty on the street. Currently when this happens I feel the urge to curse back, although I never do anymore, and this holding back of emotions causes my chest to tighten and pressure builds up and I get pissed. Like today, I was writing on this diary & I reached the last stop on the train. I was not paying attention so I stayed on my seat. The lady train conductor screamed: "Last stop! Hellooooooo?!" Pa' que fue eso! It got me SO pissed! In the past there have been times when I've fallen asleep in the train and in that stop a conductor would yell: "Last stop!" and this would wake me up, I would get off the train and that would be the end of it. But the hello at the end made me feel like the woman was saying to me: What are you an idiot? Don't you see that the train stopped? Didn't you hear me say Last stop before from the other train car? I guess what I want to work at is at not hearing the unsaid insults of other people. Because every time I get angry it is because I hear these insults even though no one is saying them. So in essence it is me who's insulting me.

My second resolution is: Do not take things personally. Do not say to myself insults that other people have not said.

This is a good start. My original idea for this blog was it to be a journey of self discovery, something that would help me to discover my True Identity and help others find theirs through my experience. But identities are harder to come by than say a year long happiness project. I believe this is a good start to my much longer True Identity project. So the first step to my true identity project will be to do a happiness project. Now i have to do some more research and start working on my happiness project. Hope you join me for the ride.

New Beginings!

I haven't written in two months! A big No-no in the Blogging community. But since I have no readers yet, I guess it's not as bad....

A lot has changed since last time I wrote. I feel like I do have a map now. Yey!! And I have Momasphere to thank for that! Free advertising here!! LOL They don't know it yet but they have changed my life. I suggest you guys check them out too!

Through Momasphere I have been inspired by meeting many other women who are very similar to me, women entrepreneurs, women who make a living helping other women find their creativity, to find their voices, women who do what they love and are moms too! And through Momasphere I have been able to realize that, I too can be a Mompreneur and help other people, and be happy. I know that it takes time and effort and I have to take this one step at a time, but I believe that it is possible and I will take all the inspiration I can from all these wonderful women around me.

If I don't start I'm never going to start it!

I haven't written in a while, I've been studying, remodeling my house, etc. I've been thinking and re-thinking about all the things I want to put into this website. All the things I want to write about. About all the things that get in the way of people's true identities and of the things that can help find it. But it's so much info that I'm also just recently learned and that I'm still trying to digest that I feel overwhelmed and don't know where to start. But the same way that I started my very first Blog entry I just had to say: Just DO IT! (and I'm not referring about sneakers here :P)

So, not so long ago, I would say less than a year ago I noticed how my oldest daughter who is now 8 seemed to get overwhelmed easily, how she would throw tantrums when tired or hungry, how she gets bored easily and over stimulated easily as well. I kept thinking: Is this normal? I kept thinking she was highly sensitive but had no clue that High Sensitivity was an actual thing. I kept thinking she was sort of empathic as she was able to feel deeply other people's feelings. I felt like I needed to help her learn how to deal with her trait, and felt really unprepared to do it. So I went online and searched books on high sensitivity and discovered the book The Highly Sensitive Child by Elaine Aron I bought it right away and as I read the book I kept seeing myself in the things it described, and I started to wonder if I was highly sensitive too. So I went and bought The Highly Sensitive Person and I started to notice that I was highly sensitive. I haven't finished either book because every time that I was reading about something a topic came up in the book that would make me want to seek more info on the subject. I knew that Elaine Aron had written a book called The Highly Sensitive Person in Love but I kept thinking that I wasn't really in love (even though I've been married for about 11 years) so I thought I didn't need it at all. However I kept feeling like I needed more info, I needed to know how to deal with people who don't seem to "get" my sensitivity so I started to find out more about this book and I read that it not only helped with romantic relationships but many aspects discussed in the book also applied to other kinds of relationships like same sex friends or family members so I decided to give it a try. And let me tell you that I have learned so much about myself through reading the pages of these books and I know there's so much more to learn. By discovering my High Sensitivity I have been able to discover the entrance to the path I want to take on the journey that it is my life. I always felt like I was supposed to go somewhere, do something I felt like I was walking through life with no direction, no purpose and I felt so empty. I had no goals in life, no where I wanted to go, so I never felt like I had to work toward something. I was just living an empty life of surviving and providing for others but not for myself. But by discovering this about myself and my child I have found a clue to the path I want to take in life, and that is a very good thing after all.

To find out if you or your child are highly sensitive try the Highly Sensitive Person's Self Test or the Highly Sensitive Child Self Test.

About Food...

OMG, I feel nauseous! Remember I said that I was going to start bringing my own lunch in order to save money in the About Dreams Post? Well...today I didn't. There was enough left over food to eat for dinner today again, so I figured I would eat that instead of having to cook again...So I had a filling breakfast and headed off to work thinking I would eat something like a salad or something, maybe a sandwich from a bodega...However, my boss was out of the office and on his way in he asks me if I want something to eat. How nice! I say, well a salad sounds nice! He comes back with my salad and this chocolate danish - kosher. I'm not Jewish but I just love kosher chocolate, it tastes so much better for some reason... He told me that the danish was for his friend that he had bought it for later, however he didn't think he was going to meet up with his friend anymore so he said I could eat it if I wanted.
I had no intention of eating it...
But it smelled so good...
I figured, maybe my boss' friend comes in and takes it, I can't eat it...
Then my boss leaves without the danish...and there it is, in front of me, on my desk.
I close the bag and put it aside...but the salad was not filling enough...
I'm hungry...maybe I'll just take one bite, just to taste it...
mmm... soooo gooooood!
Ok, that's it... no more...
well, just one more bite...

So what happened? Well, the danish was about 8 inches long and 4 inches wide. What's left right now is what I should've had...one bite...
I feel..."empalagada"! That's a spanish word for the feeling you get after eating too much sugar, that feeling that sometimes makes you eat salty foods just to get the feeling away... I'm full.
REALLY FULL!!! I close the bag and put it out of the way...I have to throw it or I will end up eating the last bite and regret it.

I had to go to another office 2 floors up and I took the stairs instead of the elevator. I was totally out of breath. I should exercise more. I go to Bally's website and request a Free Pass for a center that's not too far from my work... After I request it, it says it's only good for 7 days! I would've waited to request it if I had known that!

The gym is in an inconnvenient location for me... I should do more to exercise, I should start.
I don't want to eat no more danish. At least I vow not to buy them, I only eat them if someone gives me one...

I don't know, I should talk about health and my issues with the gym and with food, and all this stuff. I'm not a fat person, but I can stand to loose the weight I gained in my 2 pregnancies...

Let's see if I can get motivated...

I have to go now...Talk to you tomorrow. :)